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In the latest Funny or Die.com short, Heidi Montag speaks out about the horrors of having to pay for plastic surgery with a credit card.
The blond star of “The Hills” talks about some of her recent surgeries, Lauren Conrad, and most importantly, how you can contact your senator to push bank and credit card reform.
Did anyone see the phone number to call? I got distracted about 6 seconds in… 
For about two and a half decades now, professional finger-waggers have found a decent niche for themselves in the flourishing sexual harassment industry from which they can rail-against the loathsome scourge of men who inadvertently cast appreciative glances upon the figures of women co-workers. So the MacKinnonite theory goes: If that form of rampant delinquency is ever-assiduously rooted-out and punished severely enough, it will prod everyone towards a more respectful workplace in which the first thought that enters a man’s mind when seeing a provocatively dressed, pouty-lipped woman sporting a bod that won’t quit will be: “Great accounting degree!” rather than: “Great legs!”
In my guts, I suspect that could only be attained when the last shreds of human instinct are beaten-out of existence via unimaginably powerful bureaucratic apparatuses which regulate every facet of life and constantly hold the hammer of punishment over people’s heads. Just imagine what kind of Utopian workplace that would turn-out to be, eh? Plus, it’ll work-out swell for the people holding the hammer.
But until that marvelous day arrives, us folks will have to make do with, shall we say, less-than-ideal palliatives. (Hallelujah!) And on that note, famed actress Marion Cotillard is on the case to inform us of an elegant solution to the age-old problem of getting those meatheads to look you in the eyes instead of at your juggs.
Best of all, it has NOTHING to do with you closing up the topmost buttons on your blouse so that the lacy edges of your bra don’t tantalizingly peek-out. That’s a ridiculous idea and there’s no reason you should ever considering doing that as long as you live. Ever. Pretty please? So purge that heresy from your silly little head immediately.
Right. Instead, you ought to consider getting a pair of Forehead Tittaes™ by Janae, which is a far more sensible thing to do. Plus, it sounds French. Or Walloon. Or something.
Let’s watch!
Simple. Elegant. Sensible. Buy some for yourself and for all your friends.
Hmm. You know… I think I might’ve seen a pair of those being worn by some background characters in a particularly cheap episode of Babylon 5 one time.
At the Academy Awards after party this past Sunday, two awards for best cleavage definitely should have been given to Christina Hendricks and Katy Perry.
Ladies, we applaud you.
Some other ladies not shy about showing off their ample assets on the red carpet included Mariah Carey, Hilary Swank, Vanessa Hudgens, Stacey Dash, and Amber Rose.
Who was your favorite breast dressed celebrity of the evening?
Daniel Angerer, owner of the New York City restaurant Klee Brasserie is making headlines with the newest addition to his menu: “Mommy’s Milk” cheese, made from his wife’s excess breast milk.
The chef began experimenting with human milk in the kitchen eight weeks ago after his wife gave birth and she began freezing her excess milk. The idea has delighted some, and disgusted others, but is not the first attempt to promote human milk for general consumption.
A while back a Swiss restaurant named Storchen introduced a menu featuring human breast-milk edibles, which inspired PETA to ask ice-cream giant Ben & Jerry’s to switch from unhealthy bovine juice from tormented calves (aka cow milk) to healthier, humane human breast milk.
Though Ben & Jerry’s wasn’t so keen on the idea, Daniel Angerer’s supporters are now urging him to consider making breast milk ice cream as well. The chef invites anyone who’s interested to try his titillating creation, and even offers a recipe for the cheese on his blog should you ever actually want to try it at home.
Interesting idea for the purposes of sustainable eating, but I think I’ll have to take a pass on this one.
[ From: opposingviews.com ]
Though slightly ridiculous, the Cami Secret seems to be quite functional – assuming you wish to cover up any cleavage in the first place. 
For the second time in about a week, Colorado has gotten upset over an ad featuring boobs. The first time was over an ad that revealed puppet boobs belonging to Lucy of Avenue Q. This week, the boob outrage was over a banner advertising the Perky Cups coffee shop, where the waitresses serve coffee and burritos, while wearing bikinis.
The city council of Aurora, CO deemed the ad legal after people complained, but then the coffee shop’s landlord took it down anyway on Wednesday for the sake of being a good neighbor. The decline of business due to the removal of the banner has yet to be determined.
[ From: AdFreak.com ]
555 is usually the start of a fake number in the movies, but for Stephx it’s very real. It’s her HoF number, which she received on February 18, 2010. She is the 26th Hoffer of 2010. Her friends say “All I can say is…yummy:)”, “She is truly one of a kind: funny, smart, amazing to talk to, and obviously drop dead gorgeous! Talk to her once and you will be hooked for life”, and “Beautiful, fun, smart, great to talk too! Lets all help her out!”.
This News article serves as an advance notice that we are planning a policy update regarding activity requirements of members in Hall Of Fame (a.k.a. HOF). As of April 2nd, we will be enforcing the same 30-day activity requirements for both HOF and non-HOF members up until the point that model agreement documents are received by MFI. What this now means is that if a member in HOF fails to uphold an active role on the site, her account will enter a suspended state, at which point she will come out of HOF and her donations will become available for transfer.
Once the policy is implemented, it will be a lot harder to go for an extended period of time without either having the surgery, or at least staying active on the site. If a surgery must be delayed for whatever reason, we feel that it is only fair to require that those in HOF at least keep their friends informed as to the reason(s) why.
We hope that with this change it will be less likely that we see a once friendly face disappear upon reaching her goal, as she is still a very important part of the MFI community.
No, this is not about the sister of the 3-boobed prostitute from Total Recall. 47-year-old Mary Alaimo is suing her plastic surgeon for $5 million over a botched breast augmentation that went so poorly that she “came out of that operation with essentially four breasts.”
According to Alaimo’s suit filing, her breasts now “appear flattened on the bottom with severe swells the size of a softball on top,” and that she suffers from “pain… disability, loss of self-esteem, humiliation and embarrassment.”
Even after undergoing two corrective procedures -the first with the original doctor- Alaimo purportedly suffered more scarring and “implants that slid downward, making her breasts appear even further deformed.”
In terms of a defense, the doctor’s lawyer said that Alaimo should have been more aware of the risks of plastic surgery before going under the knife.”Plastic surgery is trivialized,” He said. “But the reality is that plastic surgery is just that—surgery. There are no guarantees.”
Yes, there will always be risks associated with surgery. But four boobs even after two corrective surgeries? I don’t think he’s going to win this one.
[ From: consumerist.com ]
February 17, 2010 will be a day Sasha remembers for a long time. She became the 554th member of the Hall of Fame and the 10th for February 2010. Her friends say “I find Sasha an intelligent, charismatic, respectable, classy, sensual woman. Her beauty is alluring, but it does not define her. I recommend you get to know her, and treat her with respect, as she will make your life that much more fulfilling”, “One of the sexiest seductive women I have met on MFI. I look forward to a long and wonderful time of getting to know her”, and “Sasha is a classic beauty – Monroe-esque with style, sophistication, glamour and a hint of sexual mystery. Add intelligence, charm and compassion and you have an awesomely beautiful girl. Simply breathtaking”.
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